Vice President Cheney unable to hold liquor

VP Dick Cheney admitted having "one beer" several hours before the accidental shooting took place. After visiting a few forums and learning from a liberal poster that Cheney was drunk, I had to get to the bottom of the well to find out how Cheney could get drunk off of one beer and still be able to be under the influence of alcohol hours later.

Getting drunk enough to accidently mistake a man for a bird and shooting him is a major issue. I couldn't figure it out, but then I realized that it happened in Texas and everyone knows that everything in Texas is BIG.

Typically, a can of beer, or "one" beer is only 12 fluid ounces. Perhaps it was a 16 ounce can or even a ghetto "forty", but the VP says it was just one beer. This just doesn't seem to add up.

The size of beverages keep getting bigger and bigger. It used to be that a 12 ounce drink was the largest you could find in fast food places and gas stations, now it's 32, 44, and even 64 ounce cups.



So the liberal posting on an HBO Real Sports forum was absolutely right. Not only Cheney was drunk when he shot his lawyer friend, he was plastered. "Loooook at that tu- tu- tukey ofer der, imma go shot."

The red state of Texas brainwashed Cheney into thinking that the normal sized can of beer to be 256 ounces, the equivalent of two gallons.